Thursday, March 06, 2008

So I had my last doctor's appointment yesterday. It was awkward. It's always awkward when you have to see the doctor. It's much more awkward if you were so drugged up in the hospital that you didn't realize that your doctor was SCREAMING hot... until he walked in for your appointment and you are with out your pants and your legs are already up in the stirrups. Then I can guarantee that I would be blushing bright red and rather speechless. Oh my. And then I can also guess that when he attempts to make small talk with you, you will only be able to come up with one word answers. I really am smart, honest. I do have a pretty large vocab, since I am a book worm. But I couldn't come up with anything to say. Maybe it's because I wasn't wearing any pants. Hmmm.... note to self: Wear pants at all times to decrease embarrassment, and increase positive impressions with Hot Doctor.
Here is the good news to help you recover from that scary mental picture. The Doc has okayed the imbibing again! So... bring on the green beer ladies! I am still avoiding my most favorite of habits, caffeine... but that is by choice. I am hoping to keep it to a once in a while treat now instead of a must have every morning or I will probably die thing.
What else is new? I almost had an emotional breakdown yesterday in an attempt to keep myself from freaking out. I am not a road rage person. I think that you will find that I tend to just go with the flow, not really get upset about much... Then yesterday happened. And now my count is at one (car contained) explosion. Sigh. This lady in a minivan was tailgating me like no other through the construction on my way home. I pulled up to the stoplight, in the right hand turn lane, and stopped at the red light. I was enjoying the rare spring sunshine, not really in a hurry at all. Mean Minivan Lady honks her horn. I look up confused, because the light was still very red, and there were people coming so I couldn't turn yet. I kinda shake my shoulders and give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe it was an accident, right? I have done that before.
So I inch out a bit, and decide that I am just going to wait for the light to turn, since traffic is somewhat heavy and I don't want to die. Then the opposing traffic starts to left hand turns... and Mean Minivan Lady LAYS ON HER HORN!!!! As in, GET YOUR BUTT MOVING. And that is when I fell apart. Really. There isn't a law that says I have to turn right on a red light if there is no traffic coming. It's a privilege you freaking mean lady. You and your stupid HUGE mini van with your snotty nose picking kid in the front seat busy flicking what ever the hell he found in his nose have no right to start screaming at me from inside your van because I'm not moving fast enough for you. Way to show your child how to deal with stressful situations in an educated manner.
We can all guess what I did. I sat there until the light turned VERY green, like the mature adult that I am. MML then sped around me, cut me off and then had to slam on her brakes for the next light the was red. Ha. Good think you freaked out on me so you could make that red light. Karma is a bitch, isn't it? I hope that your kid flicks the next booger at you.
And I can say, I am thankful that I can drink again. Because days like this drive me to it.